Fear Not

Fear Not

Through a series of events, my son decided to attend Georgetown University, a Jesuit college on the other side of the country. I was sad and excited at the same time. He was far away, but he was also somehow connected -- at least Georgetown would expose him to some “mandatory” religion courses and keep him in a formal association with God.

My son leaving for college marked a dramatic season in my life. In one month, I lost my son, my second husband (affairs and communication breakdown finally led to divorce), my house (as part of the divorce), and my dog (new apartment didn’t allow pets, so he moved in with my mother). As a teacher, I also changed schools and grade levels. I was in disarray -- so I started seeking God’s plan for the rest of my life. As part of my prayer time, I started writing letters to God.

I need your solace and peace in this difficult situation. I feel so worthless and ineffectual, yet I feel a wisdom, and a patience, and a lack of self-pride, which must come from you, as I can’t claim it as mine. I wish I could see your plan for our lives. Everything looks so hopeless now. Please guide me. What do I need to do?

You and your world are so great, and I am so small -- who am I that you care, but you do. I feel your care, and I’m so thankful. I know you have a wonderful plan for my life. Please open it one day and one step at a time -- and keep me from getting in the way.

Thank you for your word today about King Solomon asking for wisdom. Help me to see how I should ask so that I may improve during this crisis and not fall victim to the world and my worldly desires. Be with Randy and help me explain things to him. Keep him in your paths. Give me wisdom to continue guiding him in your way. Thank you for your hand on him thus far. Thank you for letting me have him for awhile.

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